What the 2010 FIFA World Cup can Teach Us

Image by Art 4 Inspiration

As the FIFA World Cup has been dominating not only my television but the focus of most of the population, I have realised that there are some lessons from the group rounds in South Africa, that we can apply to our lives.

Event 1: Italy did not win a single game and are out
Lesson: You can be on top of your game (they were champions 4 years ago), yet if you play with fear and confusion, depending on cheating to win - you will lose. Italy have a lot of talented players yet still no team as their mindset is one of ego and self-importance. True championship winning teams work with an attitude of cooperation and collaboration, not worrying about who scores or gets the credit for the success. Their priority is using their strengths and potential to ensure victory, each playing their part in the team so that the team triumphs.

Event 2: New Zealand did not lose a single game and are out
Lesson: When you display determination and a fighting spirit, when you give it your all and not give up, you will be seen as a hero to those who witnessed your efforts. This is regardless of the outcome. The strength of character that the New Zealand players showed in the face of stronger adversities, can only take them on to a bigger and brighter future. They went to South Africa as underdogs, took on the challenge with a great sense of self-belief and a vision of success and will be going home heroes.

Event 3: The USA topped their group over the football giants England
Lesson: It was assumed that the American team were going to have to fight for second position in their group behind the might and talent of the English team. However, the USA were working with the strong belief, that they made public, that they could beat any team in the competition. The USA paired this positive thinking with high quality preparation and intelligent use of the talent on the team. By creating a culture of self belief and success before the tournament, the Americans were able to progress through the challenges they faced and scale great heights to shine.

Event 4: France come bottom in their group
Lesson: Conceit, arrogance and blatant displays of disrespect coupled with a blame mentality saw the French "team" self-destruct. The French blamed their results on everything from the ball, the refereeing, to the weather. The only thing they could agree on was that they were not at fault. This victim mentality, if left to fester usually spirals downwards to failure. Yet it can be taken as a warning that a change is required. If you find yourself blaming external circumstances, you might need to look at how you can respond, what actions can you take to help you reach your goals and make a positive difference to your life situation.

Event 5: Australia let a bad start ruin their chances to qualify
Lesson: While a poor start can lower the odds of your future success, moving forward depends a lot on the attitude you take with you. Australia have the talent to take on the Germans, what they lacked was the self-belief. Australia did not believe they could beat the Germans and they proved themselves right. Even when you are losing, if you take on an attitude of defeat instead of fighting on, it will be your future downfall. You need to notice the signs of self-doubt and take immediate action to overcome it. Look for evidence that supports and builds on the positive rather than the negative and see the difference it can make.

So as the World Cup frenzy continues to take over the globe, it will be fun and interesting to watch for more lessons we can learn.

What the 2010 FIFA World Cup can Teach Us

Having a Purpose in Life

When you discover your personal purpose in life, you will have more clarity, direction and passion. It makes decision making a simpler process as well as acting like a compass on your journey through life.

While it may not easy to just state your life's purpose with just a few moments thought. It involves probing your innermost thoughts and beliefs. Something that can be frustrating, painful or down right scary. It is however worth it.

Developing your personal purpose is not a problem to solve; it is more like a voyage of discovery and self-learning. It is a every evolving process that can take countless hours of reflection to determine what is truly meaningful in your life. You can be assured that this purpose will be linked to your values and dreams. Because the meaning of our life is related to our purpose.

The process of finding our individual purpose involves asking and honestly answering lots of questions:

- What activities and work thrill and enthuse me?
- What are my own unique talents and strengths?
- When am I at my best, my happiest and most alive?
- What is on my bucket list, those things that you really dream of doing?
- What does this list tell me about my inner desires, dreams and direction?

An activity that I found to be most enlightening, is to write your own obituary. How do you want to be remembered when you die? What stories and memories are your children and grandchildren going to have of you? What legacy are you going to leave? What are your family, friends and peers going to say about you at your funeral and beyond?

Once you know your purpose, consider how it can influence your destiny. Below are just some areas that knowing your purpose could impact upon:

Your work:
Does your career, vocation or job support your purpose? Make a list of all the ways that your work offers you to stay aligned with your purpose. Do you need to find new responsibilities or maybe a new position or whole new direction that gives you the opportunity to live the life you desire.

Your family:
Have a family discussion about shared values. What is everyone's ideas for what they what for the future. Find common ground and ways to make these ideas a reality.

Setting goals:
Goals are just stages on your journey through life, a tool to help you fulfill your potential or a lesson of self-improvement and self-knowledge. You have to set goals to make your purpose a reality, but these goals are a vehicle on your journey not the destination. Goals have a beginning and an end, while the process of finding your purpose is never-ending.

Being yourself:
Your purpose is as individual and unique as you are, it is yours and yours alone. So do not let external forces influence it. It is about your life, not what anyone wants or thinks you should be. If you have any negative feelings about sharing it with others, then keep it to yourself. It's not about impressing others, and should only positively affect you.

Ideally, you want your whole life to reflect the expression of your values, dreams and purpose. Finding and living your purpose is something we should all aspire to, it should be our strongest motivator and guide to being our best. And the greatest thing about finding your purpose, is that you are in control of it.

Having a Purpose in Life

Motherhood - A Rollercoaster Ride

Making the decision to have children is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body.

Motherhood for me has been like a roller coaster. It involves the highest highest, as well as the lowest lows. I love my two gorgeous children and would willingly give my life for them. I am proud of their individuality, their achievements and their attempts. I delight in their hugs and affection, their humor and their laughter. From the time I first looked into their eyes, I was in love, deeply, totally and forever. There is nothing that these two can do that will stop me from loving them.

This level of love, I have found also has a flip side. I hurt when they hurt, and the arguments and harsh words can cut deep. After one particularly dispute filled with damaging allegations between my 10 year old and myself, I needed space to calm down and find the meaning to it all again. I questioned if I could continue, or if I had failed on this journey of motherhood.

Having one of your nearest and dearest, tell you that they hate you, that you suck as a mother and that they would rather have someone else for a parent. Well it is extremely painful. It makes you wonder your own worth and strength, as least that was my case.

So often it is the people who we love the most have the greatest power to hurt us. It is at this exact moment that we need to remember why we love them so much. To get past the pain they are inflicting and find the pain they are feeling. To stop thinking about yourself and start feeling with your heart.

I received a quote the other day, from the amazing Mahatma Gandhi, saying "An eye for an eye only makes the whole world blind." I interpreted it as being, that you return hate for hate, then you not only lose sight of where you are going, of what is important as well as all that is good in the world. When you send out love you might get hurt and it won't stop the pain. What it does stop is the cycle that is so easy to spin out of control into a barrage of torment that doesn't stop when the words end. It turns it around with caring and understanding. This is an example of the power of love. It ends the pain and brings gratitude into the lives of all the people involved.

Motherhood - A Rollercoaster Ride

Inside Each of Us is an Innocent Child

"Children are like wet cement - Whatever falls on them makes an impression" - Hiam Ginott

In my role as a teacher, one of the hardest aspects I encountered was seeing parents that had separated or having conflict in their partnership using their children to hurt their ex/partner. The number of court orders surrounding custody of children is on the increase. I know that in circumstances of abuse this is necessary. Yet often it is just vindictiveness, revenge or spitefulness on the part of the parents. I feel strongly about this subject because as a child I was subject to the same ordeal and have only recently, some thirty-plus years later come to terms with it and found some positives lessons from my experiences of early childhood.

One of my earliest memories is of my parents having screaming matches and throwing things at each other while I was in the same room - I was 4 years old. As a result of my parents divorce, I spend my childhood feeling torn between my parents and used as a pawn in their battles. I grew up feeling angry at both parents for various reasons, abandoned by a father who I adored, and scared of facing conflict so often withdrew as a defense mechanism.

I was lucky! I had a grandfather who I knew without a shadow of doubt loved me for being me unconditionally, who encouraged me to follow my dreams and filled our time together with love and laughter.

Since that time, I have come to realise that my parents were doing the best they could do at the time with the resources that they had. Because of this, I always reassure my own children that they are loved regardless of their behaviour and that arguing and conflict will happen in families and friendships. Yet can be solved without violence or blame. As from this, I now refuse to be have a victim mentality and take full responsibility for my life, ups, downs and everything in-between is used as a learning experience.

However, the main positive that this experience has taught me is that innocent children should be protected, nurtured and encouraged to shine in their individuality - and that inside each and every one of us the lives an innocent child.

I ask that today you get back in touch with that inner child and experience the wonders of the world as they do. Sit and observe a young child, everything is here for their pleasure, from the grass to roll in, the autumn leaves to play in or the wind to ruffle their hair. Now learn a lesson from them and take enjoyment and pleasure from whatever comes your way. And if you have any children in your life, go and hug them and let them know how special and unique they are.

Inside Each of Us is an Innocent Child

A Smile

A smile is such a simple gesture yet can bring so much to both the giver and the receiver. It is like that small ray of sunlight that peeks out from the storm clouds, a glimmer of hope, a spark of a new friendship, a positive affirmation of thanks.

A smile is such a universal sign of happiness and joy. It looks good on people of all ages, colours and genders - basically a smile does not discriminate, while it adds beauty to those people who share one with someone who does not have one of there own.

Also a smile costs nothing to give, so is not affected by the global economic situation, but it can make everything seems so much better.

Why not trying wearing one today and see how your world improves.

A Smile

Praise is the Food of the Soul

So often I have seen how it is praise for the small steps along the way, praise for the little things that make a big difference. We all like to know that we are appreciated and what we are doing is "good". And it is important that we praise our loved ones, friends, work mates and especially our children so that they will know that we are happy with their efforts.

I came across a small piece by Bernie Siegel, in his book 365 Prescriptions for the Soul, about the importance of praise.

Praise is seen in your eyes when you look at your beloved. Praise is felt in your touch when you embrace. Praise is heard in your voice when you speak to the one you adore. Praise is about your loved one's potential and the hope you have for that person. Praise is like helium; it lifts us up above the troubles and obstacles of life. Praise does not say you are perfect. It says I admire you and what you have accomplished and what I know you will go on to do. Praise is the food of the soul. No one survives long without it.

So, who have you praised and lifted higher today? I have found that when we praise from our hearts, the effects are magnificent. A few words is often all that is needed - a thank you, a well done or that's great. A genuine compliment lives long after it is said.

I will leave you with colourful quote from an unknown author:

Praise is like fertilizer....... Sprinkle it freely and those you love will grow, bloom and blossom.

Praise is the Food of the Soul

Snap Out Of It!!

There are times the majority of us experience that crazy cycle of feeling like things are too hard and we just want to curl up and cry and then move to feeling pissed at the world and that everything is against us. You know that up, down, round and round - stop the world I want to get off type of feeling. Or at least I hope I'm not the only one who has ever had this feeling.

If you have ever been in this crazy cycle of sadness and anger, by reassured that there are ways to snap yourself out of the funk.

These three simple ideas were shared with me, by one of my mentors, Mr Bob Allwright. Bob is one of Asia Pacific's leading personal development speakers and author of an awesome little book called Brilliant Attitude. And I am very grateful to be able to call him a friend as well.

The first thing to do, is to do something that serves someone else. In the words of Abraham Lincoln "To ease another's heartache i to forget your own." Meaning that when you are focused on helping others, all of your 'problems' melt away. So what can you do, that benefits another person? It could be going into a school to help kids read, or a homeless shelter, an aged care facility a charity or a hospital. Or closer to home, a young single mum, a elderly neighbour or even a member of your own family. There are so many people out there crying out for assistance and attention, you just have to be open to giving them an opportunity and your your gift of presence.

If that seems like too big a challenge, then there is a second way out of this crazy cycle. And that is to do something that truly serves yourself. Think of something that you really, really, really love to do. Now go and do it. For me it is photography, for you it might be cooking, running, dancing, sitting on the beach or playing a sport. Please note that sitting in front of a television set with a large block of chocolate rarely can be justified as being of true service to yourself as much as we might like to think it is. Because when you lose yourself in something that you are passionate about, there is no room for sadness or anger, just the magic of the moment.

If you are still stuck, thankfully there is a third and really simple way out of the cycle. Something that everyone over the age of three can do, and that is to SKIP!!! Yes you read that correctly... go for a SKIP. It might be around the block, through the park, across the backyard or just up the hallway. But if you take the example of any 4 or 5 year old skipper and use your whole body, huge steps and giant arm swings while you skip, you will find it next to impossible to be either miserable or peeved at anything.

So there you have it.... three simple, readily available ways to snap out of your funk and get on with things in a more positive frame of mind. The third one while seeming to be really silly will prove to yourself that your inner child still has the ability to come out and play, that you still have a sense of humour and can laugh at yourself and when you can know this, there is still hope and with hope comes a belief that things can and will improve.

Snap Out Of It!!