Inside Each of Us is an Innocent Child

"Children are like wet cement - Whatever falls on them makes an impression" - Hiam Ginott

In my role as a teacher, one of the hardest aspects I encountered was seeing parents that had separated or having conflict in their partnership using their children to hurt their ex/partner. The number of court orders surrounding custody of children is on the increase. I know that in circumstances of abuse this is necessary. Yet often it is just vindictiveness, revenge or spitefulness on the part of the parents. I feel strongly about this subject because as a child I was subject to the same ordeal and have only recently, some thirty-plus years later come to terms with it and found some positives lessons from my experiences of early childhood.

One of my earliest memories is of my parents having screaming matches and throwing things at each other while I was in the same room - I was 4 years old. As a result of my parents divorce, I spend my childhood feeling torn between my parents and used as a pawn in their battles. I grew up feeling angry at both parents for various reasons, abandoned by a father who I adored, and scared of facing conflict so often withdrew as a defense mechanism.

I was lucky! I had a grandfather who I knew without a shadow of doubt loved me for being me unconditionally, who encouraged me to follow my dreams and filled our time together with love and laughter.

Since that time, I have come to realise that my parents were doing the best they could do at the time with the resources that they had. Because of this, I always reassure my own children that they are loved regardless of their behaviour and that arguing and conflict will happen in families and friendships. Yet can be solved without violence or blame. As from this, I now refuse to be have a victim mentality and take full responsibility for my life, ups, downs and everything in-between is used as a learning experience.

However, the main positive that this experience has taught me is that innocent children should be protected, nurtured and encouraged to shine in their individuality - and that inside each and every one of us the lives an innocent child.

I ask that today you get back in touch with that inner child and experience the wonders of the world as they do. Sit and observe a young child, everything is here for their pleasure, from the grass to roll in, the autumn leaves to play in or the wind to ruffle their hair. Now learn a lesson from them and take enjoyment and pleasure from whatever comes your way. And if you have any children in your life, go and hug them and let them know how special and unique they are.

Inside Each of Us is an Innocent Child