Why???

Why can't I be happy with my life? Why do I always feel there should be more? That there are things I'm missing out on?

I am loved and adored by the man I love. We have two beautiful, healthy, intelligent, independent children. We have a roof over our heads, food on the table. I have friends I can call on whenever I need them. I am on the brink of a career that doesn't seem like work because it's what I'm meant to be doing.

What is so wrong with me that I can't be satisfied with what I've got? What I've achieved? I'm grateful for all that I have. That's different from feeling happy and joyful. I miss the laughter, the spontaneity, the playfulness.

Why do I have this belief that motherhood is such a serious business? How can I change it so that it becomes a belief that marriage and motherhood is a game - something fun, playful, enjoyable, full of laughter and delight.

I know and appreciate that my life includes lots of love and affection. It just seems like such work and I get so frustrated because I feel that I've lost my own identity other than wife and mother. I'm not sure who "I" am anymore.

Why???