Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Time and Worry

Today a friend sent me this quote - as quite a few of my friends do as they know I collect them. This one hit a particular nerve as lately the stress in our house has increased in the last few months due to financial matters have been stretched to near breaking point - as I'm sure many others can relate to. Anyway it goes like this:

Worry and time have an inverse relationship. The more you have of one, the less you have of the other. Yet curiously, Bronwen, both are suspended when you live in the now.

The more we worry the slower time creeps by. Yet when we are in the moment time disappears completely. Or we could remember a time of child-like innocence where we had no worries and also no concept of time. I ask the question "when does time disappear for me?

I was able to find a few examples. The one that is most special is when I'm making mad, passionate love to my gorgeous husband - but that is just between us and gives you the idea of what I'm trying to convey.

Another, that I'm blessed with is when I'm behind a camera. Don't get me wrong, these experiences are special for completely different reasons. But I realised that I truly am lucky enough to get paid for something I have done and would do for nothing - that is record events and help people maintain their memories. Though as my camera usually goes with me, I also get to capture images that I find inspirational. I use these to create artworks that I hope that others may also enjoy. I have sometimes gotten so wrapped up in the light and colours that I see through a lens that the rest of the world just falls away - the bills, the kids fighting, the pile of ironing that needs to be done - and time has no meaning. I truly hope that you are able to find your thing taht you can lose yourself in, because I have discovered that is when you can find yourself.

That sounds really deep and meaningful - I didn't start out that way. I am grateful for being given the gift to create and just want to share it with others. Yet even if no one every looked at my work, I would still feel compelled to create. I don't want praise or accolades, though they are nice if they happen, it's the process that I adore. I just need to remember that stress is my enemy of the creative process.

Note to self - worrying about not feeling creative will only make it worse, just jump in and start and the process will take over!
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Posted by Bronwen at 3:46 AM

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